SMT 911
Wearing a Speedo Doesn’t Make You Fast
East Hartford, CT – When you are drunk and high, you may think that your Speedo will help you run faster – but it won’t…especially if you’re trying to outrun a police dog. A 19-year-old East Hartford man wearing only a Speedo-style swimsuit was arrested after a police dog tracked him down and bit him on the leg.
Police said the suspect tried to steal several vehicles, and also took items from them. They said they spotted the man wearing the bathing suit and holding a toolbox that had been burglarized from a truck…and he decided to run. But of course he wasn’t fast enough. The teenager said he’d been drinking heavily and smoking marijuana. He is being held on a $50,000 bail.
Beware of the Doorbell Nudist
Redwood City, CA – If you’re 6’ 7” and weigh 250 pounds, you’re going to stand out when you ring people’s doorbells in the nude. But a 38-year-old Redwood City man didn’t seem to mind. Yet although he may have been satisfied with his body…most people answering the doors were not and police were called. He then continued to add to his charges by leading police on a car chase that ended with him streaking into a home and then into woods near Redwood City. Almost like hunting a Sasquatch, deputies said it took a Taser and two shots from a bean bag gun to bring him down. He is being charged with seven counts including driving under the influence, evading a peace officer, indecent exposure and entering a house without permission.
Swamp Shenanigans
Crowley, LA– If you ever find yourself cycling down a Louisiana street with drug paraphernalia in your bag and an alligator on your shoulders, perhaps you should rethink your path in life. A 38-year-old Louisiana man didn’t get too far down this path…because riding a bike with a three-foot alligator on your shoulders can be a real attention-getter. Once spotting the man and his toothy companion, the man ran, leaving his bike and the scaly critter behind. While an Alligator Control Officer released the alligator into the nearest swamp, the man was soon arrested and released into the nearest jail with a $15,000 bail. He was booked on resisting arrest and possessing drug paraphernalia…and cruelty to animals by abandonment. That is why you always take your alligator with you.
