SMT 911
Road Rage vs. Secret Service
Scranton, PA – With season five of the Office over for the season, it is understandable why people in Scranton may experience some road rage…but if you’re going to stop your pickup on the Interstate and attack the driver behind you with a prohibited weapon, you might want to make sure he’s not a Secret Service agent. The angry 25-year-old, who had been driving erratically on an expressway Tuesday evening, decided to stop his pickup truck and yell at the person behind him. Upon stopping, the Secret Service agent in the car behind tapped his siren, but the driver got out and approached the agent, asking, “What are you, some kind of cop?” It was a good guess, and agent identified himself as Secret Service and told the man to return to his truck. Following these instructions would’ve been smart, but instead the young man attacked the agent with brass knuckles and chunk of asphalt. The man was eventually arrested and is held in lieu of a $20,000 bail…and enrolment in rageaholic anonymous.
The Classic Swine Flu Excuse
New Haven, CT – A Connecticut family tries to avoid an arrest warrant they are being served by claiming they’ve got the swine flu. After police arrived on a report of a domestic dispute and arrested a 16-year-old, a woman in the house told them that the home was under quarantine for swine flu. Not knowing if was true, it prompted some of the police to debate on how to proceed. The police ended up playing the family’s game and donned blue masks provided to them by the Fire Department. The prisoner van was dispatched and then called off after marshals in detention refused to accept the prisoner. Instead, an ambulance was sent and the teen was taken to Yale-New Haven Hospital. Although the teen was found to be without the flu, he at least got to ride in an ambulance before he was taken to the detention hall.
Catch, Hit…Steal
Arlington, WA – There is nothing wrong with a little league coach teaching children the fundamentals of baseball such as hitting and catching…but when they focus too much time on stealing, things can go wrong…especially if the coach isn’t teaching them to steal bases. A 31-year-old Arlington little league coach is accused of just this, after using some of his players, including his own son and nephew, to help in a break-in. Using his son to climb through a vent of a vacant Arlington shop and unlock the door, the coach and the other two players were able to enter the building and steal some overhead lights and some bolts. But if your going to teach to steal, you’ve got to teach them not to confess either, and the non-related player told his dad, who in turn told the cops. While the coach will be charged with second-degree burglary, the boys are not expected to be charged.
